Happy Turkey Day!

Even though it was yesterday. I was spending the day with my super amazing family since I haven’t seen them all together since Easter. We had a great time though, and no one died, which is always a plus. I think it helped that my mom and I drank pretty consistently, we never got drunk but we were always almost buzzed. Did you know whipped cream vodka is delicious in gingerbread lattes from Starbucks? Yeah, me either until yesterday. After we ate I went back to the hotel with them and then my mom and I ditched the boys to go to the bar to see what kind of losers are there on Thanksgiving. Mostly my friends. She only had one beer with me and then went back to the room. I had four and then stumbled back. At midnight we decided to go to Walmart. Well, see, my parents are small town folk. They love living in the country. Walmart on Black Friday in the city is just not their cup of tea. They were literally rioting over vacuum cleaners. VACUUM CLEANERS. Who the fuck needs a vacuum cleaner that badly? We were actually in and out of there in about 45 minutes though and no one sustained any major injuries thank God. They headed back home today after we all woke up though and I was sad to see them go. Hopefully I get to see them on Christmas and it won’t be another 7 months.


Twenty Things.

1. I generally like animals more than people.

2. I used to have to sneak shoes I bought past my mom because she forbade me to buy any more.

3. I am a gigantic pothead, I love weed more than alcohol.

4. I still love alcohol though.

5. I could make more money at a different job but I like it, even if some days I claim to hate it.

6. I can cook really, really well.

7. I’m trying to write a novel.

8. I’m pretty much a total nympho but I haven’t gotten much lately.

9. Country music is my favorite. I love any song that tells a story though.

10. I’m in love with two different people for two different reasons.

11. I love hot weather but have to be cold to sleep.

12. I can decorate the shit out of any space.

13. I never know whether to say it’s a disease or a condition. Either way, fuck fibro.

14. My biggest regret is that I couldn’t pass bootcamp and be in the Navy right now.

15. Every plant I buy or plant ends up dying. I’ve never had a green thumb.

16. The best compliment I’ve ever gotten was “You look just like Audrey Hepburn!” She probably doesn’t remember me but I will always remember her.

17. Probably the most fun I’ve had with my mom was the afternoon at the nude beach in St. Maarten.

18. I own more LSU paraphernalia than any other brand of clothing. I even have a LSU Snuggie.

19. I don’t have cable, but I do have a lot of movies.

20. I like watching shit blow up more than the average girl, I hate wrecking cars in NASCAR though.

Just call me Jack Sparrow

Today I didn’t have work and a friend of mine didn’t have school so we did what any one would do. We stole a canoe. OK, so technically we didn’t steal it per se… We totally asked. While we were taking it. Besides, we stole it from the yacht club, it’s not like we both don’t work there. When we pulled up our creepy manager’s car was there (I swear he lives there…) so she called him and he asked her what we were doing because he saw us creeping around the building. His only concern was that we didn’t die since we were both scheduled for this weekend. It was a very successful trip though. We canoed out to this island in the lake. Drank a beer. And then canoed back. By the end of the summer we will be so good at this commandeering boats thing that we might try a sail boat.

Can’t sleep so I decided to do this….

I feel so much like Carrie Bradshaw sometimes that I figured it was my time to write a blog similar. Unfortunately I don’t live her fabulous life with her fabulous shoes. In fact I am stuck in BFE North Carolina living on next to nothing. I still have pretty shoes though. I just moved to a new place near Charlotte and this will try and be an interesting chronicle in starting over in a new place. If it’s not get the fuck over it, it’s my blog. Since it’s already 2:47am I will be cutting this one short and continuing tomorrow. I’ve already got some ideas for posts so be on the look out imaginary people that aren’t reading my blog.